Dating Women Advice: Do Women Ever Tell Orlando Bloom They’re Not Ready For A Relationship?
DON'T SHARE YOUR FEELINGS WITH WOMEN
HE asked HER to take their relationship to the next level - MISTAKE, MISTAKE, MISTAKE!!!! - read the article below and...
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Dating Women Podcast #63 & 64
Your article is right below this but first on this week's podcasts we give you:
*63: The element of surprise in dating can be powerful - use it.
*64: No, it's not okay to "hang out" with women
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READER'S QUESTION
Hey Doc,
I'm a huge fan of “The System” and what you’re all about, and I have to say that your principles and teachings have completely transformed my life. I feel on top of things now, where before I was completely lost and let women trample all over me. I would probably call you a genius, but no doubt you hear it all the time!
Anyway here’s my dilemma. I’ve been flirting with Gabriella for several weeks now. We’ve also been on many dates (very successful ones, I might add!), but recently I hit a snag. After we went out to dinner one night, I was walking Gabriella to her car, and just as we were parting for the evening, she went to give me a hug and say goodbye. But little did she know that I had something up my sleeve. I leaned in, embraced her, and planted a kiss on her. She returned the gesture. So far, so good, right?
After the kiss I told Gabriella how much I liked her and that I really wanted to take our relationship to a new level. She told me that I am an amazing guy and she really likes me too, but that she wasn’t ready for a relationship (she’d just gotten out of a long-term relationship two months before). I was stunned. This rebuff came seemingly out of nowhere, especially since I thought I was getting buying signals from her and our dates had gone so well, including her touching me on several occasions.
Doc, I KNOW this girl has feelings for me but now what the heck should I do? I feel like I’m on the emotional sidelines, waiting for something after I thought I had all my ducks in place. Should I take Gabriella out again or drop her? Should I pretend like this didn’t happen? I thought I understood all of the positive signs, but it turned out that I didn’t.
Any wisdom would be greatly appreciated!
Dax - who feels like he got blindsided
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DOC LOVE'S ANSWER
Hi Dax,
First of all, I want to thank you very much for having the ability to set your ego aside and invest in my book.
Now, let’s look at all the mistakes you made with Gabriella. You’re not supposed to kiss your date at the car – you’re supposed to kiss her at her door. I don’t want anyone seeing you kissing a girl in public. And remember that lots of girls don’t like public displays of affection. Now you don’t mention if you did this on a crowded street, but the only time you’re supposed to kiss a girl before she’s your girlfriend is on her doorstep when her mom and dad or roommates aren’t looking out the window at the two of you and no strangers are walking by staring at you.
You told Gabriella how much you liked her and that you wanted to take your relationship to a new level? Dax, I can’t believe you’re a “System” guy and you made that statement! A “System” guy would never, ever tell a girl that he likes her. NEVER. Dude, you NEVER ask a girl to go to the next level. She’s supposed to ask YOU to become your girlfriend, then you proceed from there. Are you sure you have my book?
The problem here is that you RUSHED this thing with Gabriella. All throughout my book I stress CHALLENGE, CHALLENGE, CHALLENGE to you guys. I tell you not to talk about your feelings and to let her come at you, and you broke this major rule. Yet in the very first sentence of your letter you tell me how much...
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I may have been able to find her, but I never would have been able to KEEP her without you, Jeff, and the "System."
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