She’s Been “Literally Sucking The Life, Soul, And Goodness Out Of My Brother”
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(Editor's Note, this letter was written before Doc's death in August, 2020 but still relevant as Doc's principles are timeless).
Hey Doc,
First off, I’m sorry to say that I can’t afford your materials, but I have read almost all of your columns and I can see your wisdom.
Anyway I was hoping that you would help me to help my brother to finally break it off with this girl who has, and I’m not exaggerating, been literally sucking the life, soul, and goodness out of him. He met her online, they dated for about nine months, everything moved very quickly. Within one month they said “I love you,” and within four or five they were talking about moving to Vegas and getting married. My brother is 25 and this is his first real girlfriend. She’s 21, by the way.
I saw almost straight off that she was no good, and that his Interest Level reached 99% very quickly. I’m not sure that hers ever topped 75%. Then came the real kicker. Her felon ex, who is old enough to be her father, has done 12 years in prison, and has a bunch of kids, came into town and she spent a week in a hotel with him. Even worse, my brother found out and stayed with this negative woman, even though she forbade him from exacting any sort of vengeance and refused to cut it off with her outlaw ex. Worse still, my brother spends almost as much time with this parasite as he did before. His Interest Level is still at 95% and hers has waned to probably 25%. He won’t end it even though she uses him to yell at when she pleases and to ignore when he calls her.
Please, please, Doc, help me to help him lose this vermin. Help me come up with the vaccine to rid him of this scum. Please tell me how to get through to him.
Shemp - who feels helpless
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Hi Shemp,
First of all, let me get this straight. You’ve read a bunch of my columns, you can obviously see that I have a great deal of wisdom when it comes to women and dating, you agree with everything I say – then you tell me you can’t afford my book. I don’t get it. Now if this were 1965, $99 would be a lot of money. But today, $99 is virtually nothing. You can go out with your buddies for dinner and drinks and easily blow $100 in one night and get nothing out of it except for a bad hangover. Here you’ve got a book of profound wisdom, the kind of coaching that can make your life immeasurably better in all areas, and you won’t spring for it. It makes no sense. But now I do understand how you and your brother have found yourselves marooned in this swamp.
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Shemp, this tragedy wouldn’t be happening to your sibling had he memorized my materials because I would have steered him clear of this train wreck. Did you think of that, my friend? Don’t I tell you every week in my column that if you want to avoid disaster at the hands of bad women that you have to read and commit my book to memory? Again – it’s absolutely baffling why you two won’t spend a few bucks to help yourselves. You guys must really be into pain and suffering.
On to your brother’s fix. Everything that happened between him and this girl happened way too fast. On the other hand, it’s understandable. Your brother’s 25, he’s never had a date, and this vampire happens along. If he – or any guy -- doesn’t know my principles, he’s a sitting duck for a predator. No mystery there whatsoever. Like the old saying goes, “It’s happened to millions of other guys before him, grasshopper.” And she’s only 21? In other words, she’s a little girl with a great face and a killer body and your brother is completely and totally smitten. Like the great Doctor Freud once said, “When a man is smitten, he can’t think straight.” Then again, what can your brother do? Ninety-nine smackers is way too much money to shell out to extricate him from a mess like this!
So, this little girl spent a week shacked up with a felon old enough to be her father? Like my Uncle Jethro Love says, “Sounds like she’s great marriage material!” What’s the big problem, Shemp?
ONE OF DOC'S CORE PRINCIPLES: "WOMEN HELP YOU WHEN THEY LIKE YOU!" Check out Doc's article on DatingAdvice.com!
But I’m not laughing because this is no laughing matter. This babe warned your brother about extracting revenge on a hardened criminal? Buddy, you should be warning your brother to hide from this guy! Don’t forget, this bird spent 12 years in stir. Vengeance is going to be coming AT your brother, not the other way around. He’s going to come out to his car one night, see that the tires are slashed and the windows are bashed in, and it’s going to cost him $2,200 to get it fixed. But you’re right -- $99 is way too expensive to save your brother’s life!
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The truly sad thing is that your poor brother is in Hell on earth right now, Shemp, and you’re powerless to do anything to get him out of it. And here’s the ironic part: you’ve come to me because he needs all the help he can get, but you’re too cheap to pull him out of his quagmire by buying him the only book in the world that can save him both physically and emotionally. Like my cousin Rabbi Love says, “You’re not being much of a brother, my son.”
Remember, guys: the only way you can be your brother’s keeper is through “The System.”
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